Dear Blog,

I foolishly thought that college had made me a stronger, braver, less emotional person. I was wrong. I simply have less frustration at school. I think I left part of my soul in mqt and I hope to feel more like myself once I get back there. I feel like everyone stuck in this town is miserable. I've heard people talk about how much being home means to them, or how much they don't want to leave;but everyone I talk to seems to not know what they want from their own lives. It's like dreams can't even live here.

I'm afraid to ask my mom what she wants from her life now. Mostly because I'm afraid of what she might say. I haven't a clue what my dad wants, I'm not sure he would telll me if I asked him. I want to live and be loved. I think that is mostly what everyone wants and needs. I haven't got a clue how to  help my mom. I feel like all I can do is what she asks. Sometimes I even fail at that. I want to see her really healthy and happy again. God works wonders and I hope he can help her heal. I don't want this blog to sound like my mother is sad and I cant get her out of it, because she smiles and laughs sometimes. I'm just afraid to leave her alone and miserable. I hope she will find a way to be happy again. Jesus will help her.

I want to shine like the sun and roll like a stone <3 Mqt here I come <3