Loss.

I just know read a blog about the feelings you get after having lost someone you love with your whole soul. The whole of  this young woman's soul being so vast and beautiful that having been given any part of it must have been overwhelming. To be given all of it with unconditional  love and admiration must have been something that is unfathomable by someone such as myself. I morn for her.

Having lost someone at such a young age must have made it nearly unbearable. I am so lucky never having lost anyone of major significance. I mean that not in a way that disrespects the souls of those I have lost, but only to say that we should have known each other better. I am so afraid that someone is just going to drop out of my life. I know my fear is nothing in comparison to the pain she feels. Losing her mother. My soul aces for her loss. Knowing that all I've ever "lost" was you almost gives me comfort. Knowing that you are gone and I am that much stronger makes me content.

My life seems so trivial in contrast to her's. My story lacking the significance. I'm so afraid of awkwardness. How did I get this way? I hope I never loose the people in my life and regret the things I long to say, but I will loose or be lost. I hope to love so much that I will never fade away.